Monday, December 31, 2012

2012

   Well. Another year gone. Things have changed and I've been forced to grow, whether I like it or not. My year started with confusion and frustration a car accident right off the bat. After that I was definitely relearning some things. I felt like I had lost myself and that I didn't know who I was anymore. I think a lot of it was that with that conk on the head I finally stepped back and took a look at my life and when I did I realized I didn't like where I was. I had let myself get to a point where sitting on my butt and not standing up for myself or fighting for the things I want was ok.
   Yeah no not ok. I knew that it would not be an easy transition because a lot of the problem was how much I depended on those around me for my personal  happiness and the fact was, I spent too much time looking to make everyone else happy and not enough time finding the things in my life that I did for me, the things that really hit me hard and made me smile to the core.

   Big thing # one that I learned and applied this year
       -If it doesn't make you more happy than it does sad or stressed its not worth your time.
This one helped me with running, friends, books it just kinda helped me to look at the big picture.
It really started because with the concussion I was kinda limited on what took space in my brain, therin started the impatience to this day there are people that think that I just decided to be a jerk for no reason but the fact is if I hadn't shut them out in the fastest most efficient way possible I would have been reduced to a blithering mess.

  Big thing # two
     -It is an extremely good thing to not let things get to you
When you have a roommate that you would gladly punch in the face as soon as give them the time of day you really have to work with patience and self control. I find it to be a miracle sometimes that i got over it because dealing with things like i had to used to be something that i wasn't good at.

  This year was a big learning and growing experience Idaho gave me new perspective and light this summer showed me...well it showed me a lot of things
theres always a surprise around the corner, you are usually wrong, sometimes going back is better than going forward, life likes throwing curve balls (think chronicle) oh and right when you think you know whats up life changes.

well as always this blog has deteriorated into a rant but heck, what of it
all in all just about anything that could have happened, happened this year, and the fact is that's just fine by me. no mater how rough things get that's life and whats life without a few potholes.

-"It's just that...I just think that some things are meant to be broken. Imperfect. Chaotic. It's the universe's way of providing contrast, you know? There have to be a few holes in the road. It's how life is."